“One in four women and one in six men will be sexually assaulted at some point in their lifetimes. These statistics are probably underestimates (31).” So writes Dr. Justin Holcomb. Sexual assault is a prevalent problem. But that requires that we understand exactly what sexual assault is. Defining it is the first step to stopping it.
Holcomb writes that it is extremely important to fully define sexual assault. If our definition is to narrow it will actually serve to do more harm to actual victims. Holcomb writes:
A definition that is too narrow can cause some victims of assault and those who should be supporting them to downplay the experience. Our definition of sexual assault is any type of sexual behavior or contact where consent is not freely given or obtained and is accomplished through force, intimidation, violence, coercion, manipulation, threat, deception, or abuse of authority. (27-28).
I think this is a helpful definition because it includes a number of activities that would otherwise go ignored and silenced.This includes acts that are physical, verbal, or psychological. This includes acts by strangers, friends, family, or even spouses.
It is important to understand this definition. Sexual assault is a serious sin with serious consequences and effects. If we are unable to properly define it we will be unable to properly help other, or unsure about seeking help ourselves. Sexual assault is more than just rape, which was the older more narrow term often applied. There has often been a significant amount of underreporting due in some ways to an assumption that because victims have not been “raped,” in the strict definition, they have not been sexually assaulted. To deal with the wickedness of sin in a healthy way we must define it appropriately and encourage all victims to see their need.
Sexual assault can happen to anyone, anywhere, at anytime, and from anyone. Holcomb writes:
Sexual assault can occur in marriage, and between dates and friends. Researchers have estimated that sexual assault occurs in 10-14 percent of all marriages. Studies estimate that incest is experienced by 10 to 20 percent of children in the general population. (31-32)
I fear that the reason this information is so surprising to so many of us is because we, as a culture, have been too timid about addressing the issue of sexual assault. As a result we have narrowly defined assault and have therefore isolated and abandoned so many victims of assault. The church, in particular, must do better.
The church I serve at has a number of folks who have been assaulted. For us to serve them well we must help them identify clearly what has happened, and help them see that they are not alone. That means properly defining sexual assault so that we can properly help victims of assault.
Sparrow & Heart Soul Care 