“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art. . . . It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things that gives value to survival.” – C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
C.S. Lewis understood things about friendship that I simply do not, but which I want to. I talk a good game about friendship, mind you, but I don’t do it very well. I am an outgoing person, an extrovert to be sure, and I love to be around and interact with people. But the truth is I really am not good at friendship. I have been thinking a lot about that as of late. The Lord has been pressing on me the value and importance of true spiritual friendship and this year I want to do better at it.
The subject has been a study topic for me lately. I have been reading on the subject a lot lately, listening to dozens of great audio lectures and discussions, and learning from the example of ancient believers. A number of thoughts have occurred to me over the last several weeks that I want to unpack more in the coming months. Thoughts like these:
* Married people don’t do friendship with others very well. In fact, some of my gay friends are way better at friendship then many of my married friends. They are better at it than I am, that much I know.
* True friends not only bear each others burdens, but they expect friends to help bear their burdens
* Diversity in friendship is actually a great gift of God. It provides us unique opportunities to grow and develop, and though we naturally tend to form bonds with those who are a lot like us, we shouldn’t do that exclusively.
Friendship is a beautiful gift of God. Ancient cultures understood it far better than most of us do. For all my connectivity I fear that I am often not any better at friendship than my impersonal Facebook posts. I want to do better. I want to be a better friend. So I’ll be starting a series in the forthcoming weeks, after I line up all my ideas, to think through this subject, I hope you’ll join me in the discussion and journey towards deeper relationships.
Sparrow & Heart Soul Care 
I have been blessed with friends I’ve had since childhood, and we still get together, do things together, share joys and burdens, talk on the phone, just plain ‘share life’, etc! Many of my friends became friends during my high school years, and we still get together, do things together, talk on the phone, share burdens , sorrows, joys, raised families together, and just about everything! Other friends became friends later in life and are precious friends, too. It has been a joy and a blessing; a gift from God to be sure. There’s just about no one like a true friend who really, really knows you and loves you just the way you are and you love them just the way they are!! It’s wonderful! I hope you can develop some friendships like these!
I look forward to your insight on friendship. I’d never given friendship a lot of thought in the past. But as friends have come and gone in my life throughout the years, having some for longer seasons of my life and others for a short time, I’ve kind of reevaluated what friendship is now that I’m much older. Also for me, having girlfriends was always important since I was an only child and married later in life. Having Christian friends is a blessing from the Lord and I hope that will occur for you this year.